So hey, it’s a tough topic to pick on but the year is almost up and new doors are opening for us in 2019.
Let’s roll up our sleeves. It’s time you start knowing what types of Loves there are, in order to better understand yourself.
1. The – I’ll tolerate you enough to survive you Type of Love
It is sad to know, but most of us are in the “love and hate” relationship. Well, maybe don’t feel too bad about it cos it’s pretty normal actually. Nothing serious or major.
You start off really madly in love cos you’re still young in your 20’s, and then you learn about each other through your 20’s, and then you’re together for far too long reaching your late 20’s that it’s kinda instinctive to do the next thing which is get married even though you’ve grown apart all these years or aren’t anywhere near similar to the other person anymore.
So you get married, you tolerate each other and you won’t let the other go cos you’ve invested too much of your time, effort, memories and family relations yada yada yada to give up anything after your 30’s, especially after having kids.
There’s just too much on the line and it’s such a hassle to go plumage through an ordeal of dealing with divorce or separation.
You end up staying for the kids, and that is all.
So are you a living a fulfilling and abundant life? Are your needs met, emotionally, physically and intellectually ?
Mm hmm..better ask yourself these questions cos the state of your mind and the very essence of who you are is about to deteriorate and rot into the abyss of boredom, complacency and emptiness as you age.
Be with someone who is on the same page. Who is either as boring as you or as interesting as you.
Even if you’re opposites and you like it that way, make sure that that’s the path that you signed up for and love it.
Stick to it. Know what you really really absolutely want. Don’t just wing it. You can’t just wing it when it comes to eternal commitment.
2. The – I love you unconditionally Type of Love.
Lucky you. You’ve found the One. You have managed to find that one true gem and diamond in the rough. The person who loves you unconditionally for who you are, the bad and the good.
A listener of your Soul, a caretaker of your Body and a Nurturer of your Mind. Holistic in all aspects, you have found a treasure so precious that if you mess this up, you’d live with regret all your life. Trust me.
Lightning doesn’t strike twice, like all the sad country love songs always say.
Most of the time, it’s true. Of course you’ve got the rare two in a lifetime finds but honey, it’s usually just that One person in your life that will love you uniquely like that and that you feel that way about.
There’s always that one person.
So take care and be kind to each other as how you always have been. Carry on the good stride.
Always showing love and care, and being considerate and respectful in your gestures and your speech. You compliment each other. That’s what you do for one another.
You are each other’s teacher and also student. You learn and discover, you experiment and enjoy together.
Moments shared are always in chill mode or in your passionate states of being.
You guys basically are made for each other in terms of holistically understanding your love languages.
And the great thing too is, that you actually care and bother enough to honor the other equally as partners.
Now that’s Rare with a capital R.
3.The – Unrequited Type of Love
I don’t know why but some of us vibe towards attracting people we can’t have or who aren’t good for us. The type of people who’ll trample on our hearts and massacre the very essence of our innocence.
Like why, right ?
Our team ambassadors are Meredith Grey and Adele’s Broken Heart albums.
This is the saddest and the most draining of love types and we just got to get off this love train to Nowhere.
It can only bring you towards a great desolate. Nothing else.
I know how you feel. I literally know. Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt.
You can not live in this poisonous state of mind anymore. Stop fantasizing and daydreaming of having their kids and wondering “what ifs”.
This illusion of ever getting (according to you as) the “Love of your Life” will not happen. Ok Kate? Lock that emotion up in some deep dark corner of your existence and throw the key away. It’s not gonna happen.
You know why? Because no one is actually Yours to own. No one belongs to you and neither do you belong to them. You’ll understand this only when you meet your Maker.
So it’s time to stop reading old Whatsapp messages you’ve been keeping for a gazillion years in a folder in your email and stop watching old videos that you took of them just to listen to the sound of their voice because you miss them.
Ok for you writers and artists out there, poets of the Achy Breaky Heart. I know this is a huge source of where your finest works come from. I know. It’s the same for me too.
Lang Leav is one great poet who has absolutely amazing material. I read her all the time. And you know you repost her beautiful misery Pinterests on Instagram. I know you do.
Just like you, I’ve listened to Adele’s Someone Like You like a billion times and cried over it till the cows come home.
But I decided one day that I’m going to start a brand new view on life and change my clouded grey skies to bright white ones. Skies that actually spout rainbows and unicorns when I dance.
Ok maybe I’m not done being blue, only because it’s like the source of my powers, my mojo for writing really good painful cry-your-heart-till-it-hurts-your-ears kinda stuff. So I keep it on lock down most times and whip that mojo out when I need to write really inspirational stuff.
The point here is, get off this sad soul train.
You truly deserve being with someone who loves you and who actually bothers and respects you for you.
Not someone who won’t take a second look at you. Who doesn’t bother to call and ignore your very existence. You don’t want to live and breathe depression.
You’ll be zombified all your life living behind the shadow of that person who you can never have.
So go get a cat.
Book yourself on the next trip up Mount Everest.
Sign up for open mic night.
Do whatever it takes to detrain. Get off on the next stop.
Your broken soul needs a holiday. Find those pieces of you and glue it back together with the strongest adhesive ever invented – Time.
It’s alright to be selfish when it comes to loving you.
Take very good care of yourself, okay.